When I arrived at Heathrow in October, I was two weeks late to the start of my course at King's College. Frazzled, cat-in-tow, I was a picture of what a middle-aged woman who thinks she can pull off acting like a 22-year-old again would look like on too little sleep and too much bluster. Luckily, I had and have enough of the latter to propel me along as I maneuver the challenges of London housing, grad school (including the protracted instructors' strike in the UK), and missing friends and family back home.
It would have helped if I had understood the following before I arrived:
1. When people tell you it's impossible to find a cat-friendly flat in
London, they mean it. If you are planning to bring your cat (as I was), start searching in advance for a place. Put down a deposit before getting on that plane. God, I wish I'd done that. It's been a nightmare and I'm not done yet. Fingers crossed for something to come up in Ealing this April.
2. Everything you've heard about the English breakfast is correct, except it's endless and it's all that is offered here. I have searched high and low for my favourite (see, I'm using a u in favorite) scrambled eggs, hashbrowns and biscuits breakfast, yum yum, but it's non-existant. I had a layover in Paris and was thrilled to get the French version of scrambled eggs, which were surprisingly delish. Don't expect to get scrambled eggs here. You will get your eggs the English way: poached, fried, overeasy. The egg goes on the toast. You will eat that with beans, yup, baked beans, a huge sausage thing, and tea. You can have coffee if you wish. Don't expect delicious blueberry pancakes or an omelette. Save that for your trips back to the States.
3. When you hear the guy on the P.A. say, "See it, say it, sort it," he's not talking about socks. To "sort" in the U.K. means "sort it out" in the U.S., except it's even more impactful. If one says "get yourself sorted" they mean get your sck2@f* together OR they simply mean collect yourself/your belongings, etc. The P.A. on the tube means "tell someone you've seen a bag sitting beside the tube." So "sort" can mean a few things; just remember, when you're waiting to hear "it out" after "sort" it doesn't come.
4. People say "hiya" and not "hi", at least in the circles I
travel in. So now I say it to baristas in the morning, my classmates, the guy who sells me those marshmallows at the Temple tube station that I should quit eating, you get the idea.
5. No one is as friendly* as you are so quit smiling at people on the street, and for Christsakes, do NOT repeat do NOT, say hi to them! You will definitely scare the person you've said HI to. Once, in the dark, I'd seen a fox (ubiquitous here in Ealing) and stopped, scared, to ask a man if he'd seen it. A classmate, British, later told me, "He was probably more afraid of you than the fox." (Caveat: a woman from the North told me that chatting with strangers at bus stops is practically compulsory farther up in England.)
6. Avoid Piccadilly Circus unless you are going shopping (Waterstone's is my guilty pleasure - books, cafe, bar, restaurant, great vibe) or
Instagram shoooting. It's so packed with tourists that you'll feel like a size 14 in a size 2 pair of knickers.
7. Buy an Oyster card. Don't buy single tickets. Just visit their
site. I'm still not an expert, but basically there's a cap on costs for the day so if you'll be taking round trips between zones (the city is Zone 1; look at the map to find other zones but they spray out in rings) you'll go broke buying single tickets.
8. If you need to take a taxi, take a black cab only. The drivers are so terrific, often with colourful stories. I am not sure people in the UK tip but I do, and no one seems offended. (Money is popular everywhere.)
9. Memorize the money in your hand. There is no note bigger than a 50 here. The ten-pence is the size of our quarter in the States. The five-pence is the size of our dime. Pence and pennies are the same colour and size, but the two-pence is extra large. My favourite coin is the 20-pence, with its cute squarish shape slightly bigger than a U.S. dime.
10. Learn the vocabulary. I just learned a new word at Hyde Park: a leash is called a "lead" here. Though apparently the term has to do with how a dog handler would handle the dog (lead rather than restrain him). Nevertheless, it's the common word on signage at Hyde Park, so bring and use your lead (note, most people don't in the park!)
GENERAL VOCABULARY DIFFERENCES:
- Elevator - Lift
- Great - Brilliant
- Rich - Posh
- Bucks- Quid (plural slang for cash)
- Teacher - Tutor/Instructor
- Bye - Cheers
- Thanks-Ta
- Sweater - Jumper
- Underpants (women's) - Knickers
Kiss - Snog * - While not as friendly, Brits are usually very kind, and for my money I'll take kindness over friendliness any day.
Changing of the guard at Whitehall photo: Wikimedia Commons Images
Changing of the guard at Whitehall photo: Wikimedia Commons Images
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